My Big Fat Greek Wedding

Most the films I watch today are rated universal, are animated and usually have as a starring role either a princess or a fairy.  But I don’t mind! I don’t mind being the only man at the cinema and the only adult in tears as Tinkerbell triumphs yet again!  Ez and I used to watch a lot of films but usually free evenings now involve doing jobs (Ez) and falling asleep (me).  When I go on retreat I take with me some films that have been in the pile ‘have not watched’ just in case I get the opportunity to fall asleep watching one.  These are usually films that we meant to watch years ago but have been gathering dust whilst we watch Peppa Pig, Hey Duggee and Bing.  Last night I watched the laugh out loud comedy ‘My Big Fat Greek Wedding’.  I laughed a lot.  I am also sure that someone brighter than me could do some interesting thoughts on cross cultural mission from the movie.  But you have probably gathered from my previous blog's that is unlikely to be me.  Instead I want to comment on my favourite line in the movie and then ask that you might allow me to self indulge a little as I share a bit of my testimony. 

Toula Portokalos is part of a fanatically proud Greek family.  She is about to become the first in her family to marry a non Greek called Ian Miller.  Ian is put through all sorts of ridiculously Greek things to be accepted as husband, son in law and as a part of their family.  Toula asks him at one stage, ‘why are you doing this’?  Ian replies, ‘because I love you’.  Toula presses again, ‘but why… why do you love me’?  Ian responds with this beautiful line, ‘because I came alive when I met you’.

Now I could get all mushy and say that is how I feel about Ez, but now she has permanently strapped to her waist three 5 and under's (which I am sort of jointly responsible for), alive is not how I always feel!  Though I of course do love my 4 girls with all my heart.  This line does though describe why I love and attempt to follow Jesus.  Because when I met him I came alive. 

I became a Christian at the age of nine when in Sunday school Mr Leach washed my feet as an example of Jesus washing the disciples feet (not because my feet were smelly).  He prayed for me, I asked Jesus into my life was filled with the Spirit and tears of joy followed.  I had many moments during the next few years where I knew and experienced Jesus which climaxed with my baptism at sixteen.  Here I heard God say that I would be a pastor.  Well, on your bike son!  There is no way I am going to be the bloke at the front everybody else criticises and judges and gives a hard time too.  Over the next year I went on a journey of world vs faith.  And the world won.  I wanted girls, I wanted alcohol, I wanted drugs… I wanted the hedonistic life style.  They were a good nine years.  I would be lying if I said anything different.  I have stories to tell.  I enjoyed the peaks.  But when life was normal, when the peaks had steadied out for the other 6 days of the week I realised I had something missing.  I was not content, I was not fulfilled, I had no purpose, I was not alive.  I met Ez during these years, clubbing in Bournemouth together, spending our nights and mornings talking.   We got together, bought a house and that could have been the 'we then lived happily ever after moment'.  But I struggled.  I seemed to have too many average days and not enough peaks.  Life was grey and not full of colour.  I was simply not alive.  A decision was needed to be made and I chose the wrong one. I left Ez to go back to a care free hedonistic life style. Ez on the other hand had been chatting to my parents on the sly!  Asking questions about their faith and what being a Christian means.  Unbeknown to me they had given Ez the ‘Why Jesus’ booklet by Nicky Gumbel.  When we broke up, she read it (on the toilet) and said the prayer on the back and she said almost the same prayer as I had all those years before with Mr Leach.  It was her time to hear God!  ‘Go and see Ben, all will be alright’.  Ez told me this, we got back together, we did an alpha course, got married and a year later we were both training to be Baptist ministers, just as God had said all those years ago in the baptismal pool!   But there was one moment I want to recall.  It was during the alpha course session ‘What about the Holy spirit’?  It was there that I once again said that prayer, a prayer of forgiveness, a prayer of commitment and God filled me once again with His Spirit and I came alive.  Suddenly I was who I should be again, once again I was being the Ben I was created to be, in relationship with my heavenly father and my word it is better than any of the hedonistic lifestyle that went before… this was 24/7, purpose, fulfilment, peace, joy… I was alive!  So if you wonder why I am a minister, why I write this blog, why I love and attempt to follow Jesus, my reply now comes from My Big Fat Greek Wedding, ‘because I came alive when I met Him’.  May you come alive!  May your life be full of joy, love, fulfilment and purpose.  May your life be in colour and not in grey.  May you know Him, the bringer of life in all its fullness and life eternal. 

I leave you with something like the prayer that I prayed with Mr Leach and Ez prayed on the toilet!  Why not pray it for yourself? 

God, I know that, in my lifetime, I have not always lived for you, and I have done things to hurt you, others and myself.  I know that you have plans for me, and I want to live in those plans. I pray to you for forgiveness for the ways in which I have not followed your ways. I am choosing now to accept Jesus into my heart. I am eternally grateful for his sacrifice on the cross and how He died so I can have eternal life. I pray that I be filled with the Holy Spirit and that I continue to live as you desire for me to live. I put myself in your hands. I pray that you work in my life and guide my steps so that I continue to live for you. In your name I pray. Amen.